The law on mandatory joint custody has been in effect for a year; it sparked controversy from the very moment Justice Minister Tsiaras introduced it in Parliament, and the results are clear. A report by tvxs.gr documents tragic cases in which custody is granted to a father who has abused the child’s mother—and often the child as well—and in which the child is even snatched by the authorities in the middle of the night.
Judges who are not trained in family law are called upon to decide even which school a child will attend when the two parents cannot agree on the matter. We have court rulings that often stipulate that the child will spend 10 days with one parent and 20 with the other, regardless of the child’s wishes, or that the child will alternate living arrangements every year if one parent lives abroad. A breastfeeding mother was forced by the court to be separated from her infant for 10 days a month, with the obligation to pump her milk and give it to the father. «Judges often make decisions based on the interests of one parent rather than those of the children, while abused mothers are now in a state of utter despair,» says Kiki Petroulaki of the European Network Against Violence on tvxs.gr.
The arguments put forward by experts and organizations—who claimed that mandatory joint custody could not resolve the couple’s problems for the benefit of the child—have been proven correct. Worse still, however, is that those who argued that this bill removes all protection for abused mothers and children and turns women into hostages of their abusers have also been proven right.
The most striking example is the case of Ioannina, where a mother, despite following the law to the letter, lost custody, and the child ended up with the father, who, according to the child’s testimony, was responsible for the child’s abuse. «In fact, Greek courts already accept the argument of «parental alienation» and the «alienating mother»—arguments that have been unanimously condemned by the international scientific community,» says Kiki Petroulaki.
«In the courts, following the Tsiara Law, the term «parental alienation» is being used more and more frequently, despite the strict recommendations of GREVIO, the Committee of Experts that oversees the implementation of the Istanbul Convention. »Fathers who have been accused of domestic violence constantly speak of false accusations,” says Kiki Petroulaki.
«The civil court—which hears cases regarding child custody and visitation—is required to take into account the existence of domestic violence against the mother and the children, since it is in every child’s best interest to live in a family free from violence. However, what actually happens is that those accused of abuse try to distort the case, claiming that the mother is alienating the child and lying, just as the child itself is. They also claim that the child is being forced by the mother to lie and attribute this to “parental alienation.”.
«I would like to remind you that women’s organizations and agencies such as EDkV, which support survivors of domestic violence and their children, fought to have this term removed from the bill because, among other things, it violates the Istanbul Convention, and the minister amended it to call it «breakdown of the relationship».» However, fathers are invoking it to seek the removal of parental custody from the mother. It was deliberately included in the law so that it could be used as a weapon against mothers.”.
The term «parental alienation» is based on dangerous pseudoscientific views, as M. Alevizopoulou and G. Papadimitriou, as detailed on tvxs.gr, and has been analyzed by psychiatrist G. Nikolaidis. In fact, one of its proponents was, among other things, a supporter of pedophilia.
Ioannina: Custody was granted to a father who has been accused of taking his child to a sexual abuser
A typical example that illustrates the impact of the Tsiaras Law on the lives of victims of domestic violence is the case in Ioannina.
«The police officers came in and took a 6.5-year-old child from his bed in the middle of the night to hand him over to his father, who, according to the child’s testimony, is responsible for the child’s abuse by a third party. It was an unjustifiable decision by a judge in Ioannina. The mother did everything required by law. And yet, she was unable to protect the child. On the contrary, whatever she did ultimately worked against both the child and herself,» says Kiki Petroulaki.
The child’s mother had herself been a victim of abuse at the hands of her former partner. She managed to get a divorce and gain custody of the child, though she allowed the father to see the child. «That was until the child told her that his father was taking him to a place where a man was sexually abusing him. The mother was unable to find out who he was, as the only clue the child provided was a name,» says Ms. Petroulaki of the European Network Against Violence, to which the mother turned for help.
«She requested a court order restricting the child’s contact with the father, but they did not grant it. Then the child also began to refuse to go, and the father became violent toward both the mother and the child. So, after that, the mother didn’t want to allow the father to see the child. However, according to the Tsiara Law, she is liable if she does not allow the father to see the child, even though she had done everything required of her and had immediately reported to the police the suspicions and evidence provided by the child. The police told her to continue handing the child over to the father, and that the father would be monitored by police officers. The court then used this fact against her. The judge said: “Why did you hand the child over to him if you were afraid the child was being abused? So you’re lying.” Even if that was the police’s decision. Even if the Tsiara Law required her to do so.
In reality, no matter what the mother did, she would lose. If she didn’t give it to him, she would be held accountable under the joint custody law; she would be considered the one alienating him. If she did give it to him, she would be a liar and the one alienating him.
The mother, too, followed the juvenile prosecutor’s instructions and consulted private psychologists, who concluded that what the child described had indeed happened. And after nine months had passed without any protection for the child or the mother, the expert evaluations began… the child, was «broken down» during the evaluations; they questioned the child, pitted the child against his father… and the judge, in interpreting them, disregarded the initial reports, deeming them unreliable because they came from private individuals, and distorted the conclusions of the next two: They do not say that they are invalid, but we cannot draw any conclusions.
They are unable to draw conclusions and are taking the child away from his mother to hand him over, by court order, to the man who, it appears, is subjecting him to abuse. Without any protection for the child, without any oversight of his safety. Without any contact with his mother, with whom he has lived his entire life to date. The mother is trying to overturn the decision, and we are drafting a brief to the Supreme Court asking it to intervene.».
Veroia: Judges Continue to Grant Custody to Abusive Fathers
As tvxs.gr has revealed, certain judges in Veroia consistently award custody of children to abusive spouses.
«The court awarded custody of our children to my abusive ex-husband. He’ll only get the children if I stop breathing. There is no justice in this country,» said M., an anesthesiologist by profession, the first to share her testimony on the site. She was followed by another woman from the same city, who revealed to tvxs.gr that the very same judges had taken her children away from her, granting temporary custody to the partner from whom she had «escaped» because he was sexually and verbally abusing her.
The same thing happened to a third woman, despite the fact that she had even presented the court with a video showing her being beaten by her ex-husband.
«These decisions are based in large part on the Tsiara Law, which gives «willing» judges the right to act to the detriment of the child and the mother under the pretext of the father’s rights. What they keep repeating is that the court does not examine the man’s behavior toward his wife but whether he is a good father. But how can a father who is violent toward the child’s mother be a good father? And how is it possible that so many victims are forced to have contact with their abusers? »Because that is what the law has done, in violation of Articles 26, 31, and 45 of the Istanbul Convention,” says Ms. Petroulaki.
However, a fourth incident also occurred in Veroia.
«A court awarded custody of three children to a man who has been convicted of a shooting and is currently facing criminal charges for domestic violence against the children’s mother,» says Ms. Petroulaki. «This shows us that in small towns, where there are few judges, if you happen to get one with stereotypical or even misogynistic beliefs, you’re done for. Women have no way out.».
Trikala: She Lost Custody of Her Child and Her Home
Under the Tsiara Law, no parent may make a decision regarding their child without the other parent’s consent. As a result, since the law was passed, dozens of parents have been flocking to the courts, asking for help in resolving issues such as which school their child should attend.
In cases where there is no domestic violence, this results in the child being traumatized and in decisions being made that do not make the child’s life easier—or, even worse, that set the wrong foundation. But what happens in cases where an abused mother leaves to save herself? The answer is that the Tsiara Law does not allow her to do so, as we saw in the cases in Veroia.
«A few months ago, a mother who was a victim of domestic violence and had custody of her two children wanted to move to another city. The father wasn’t around anyway; he wasn’t looking for the children. She moved to a different city, went to enroll the children in school, and couldn’t do so because she needed the father’s consent. »The result? She took the case to court, and they took both her children and her home away from her!” says Ms. Petroulaki.
«Under the new Family Law, as soon as you separate, joint custody applies until the mother files a petition and custody is modified. After the domestic violence complaint is filed, you’re required to contact him and tell him to come see the child. If you don’t, you risk being accused of alienating the child and of failing to exercise proper parental care. Imagine a mother who flees to save her own life and her children’s mental well-being, only to be forced to contact her abuser and tell him, »I’m here— ‘come see the child!’”.
What happened before? «The mother and children were safe until a court ruling was issued to determine issues of custody and contact with the children,» explains Ms. Petroulaki.
There is no end to these incidents, not only in the cities mentioned above but also in Athens, Agrinio, Thessaloniki, and elsewhere. «The past few years have shown us in practice that this law puts abused women at great risk. It is now much harder for them to leave an abusive relationship, and if they do, they are held hostage indefinitely, lose their children, and are put in danger,» concludes Ms. Petroulaki.
«The times we are living through will certainly go down in history… And history will show whether, as a society, we truly want victims of abuse to speak out—or, if we don’t mean it, and whether we will use the exemplary suffering and punishment of those who dared to speak out to silence all the others forever!!!»
Fotini Lambridi
