The word esocentrism refers directly to egocentrism. And not without reason. Since it was invented to express the positive side of egocentrism. Introcentrism is the term coined by Dr Nancy Mallerou, one of the most famous Greek Life Coaches, to highlight the ability to focus on the «self», on what we really are, and not on the «I», what we have built for others to see.
The aim of internalisation is to to preserve ourselves, to take care of it without guilt and to develop it, so that we are always able to give and perform to the fullest extent, without risking the famous burnout, i.e. physical, mental and emotional exhaustion. Introcentrism, in very simple terms, is the self-care without guilt.
(Learning to) take care of yourself is a matter of habit
How this can help our lives is self-evident. Self-care is the necessary foundation for living a healthy and balanced life. In her new book entitled Introcentrism. How to live unapologetically in a guilt-ridden world (ed. Field). Dr. Mullerou has collected all those ways, the strategies as one would say in the language of marketing, to conquer esocentrism. In other words, how to learn to take care of ourselves.
You may have heard that according to researchers, we need at least 21 days of replay to acquire a new habit. So the key to success is to try to change habits, keeping the new ones for at least 21 days until they become established. It may sound easy, but it is actually easier for us to get caught up in routine and fall into the safety of what we know. How do we do it?;
12 ways to conquer self-care
Like any self-help and self respecting personal development book, this book focuses on practical exercises and methods that try to incorporate the whole distillation of modern psychological and therapeutic approaches.
To achieve self-care, 12 ways are suggested here. In the book, of course, each is discussed in detail, and through special recordings-exercises the reader is helped in a very specific way. So how does a famous and recognized Life Coach think we can make self-care our own?;
- Invent time just for you
Wake up 10 minutes earlier and dedicate your time to the first 10 minutes of the day in «staying» with yourself. Do it intentionally, even if you have a family with young children. You can get away somewhere on your own for a weekend or a day trip once every 6 months.
- Learn to really listen to your thoughts
Our thoughts are repeated. We get used to thinking about the mundane. About 90% of our thoughts are recycled. Our minds are not basically built to think and by formalizing thoughts we save energy.
Only when we sit alone and silent, can we listen to ourselves thinking, pay attention and become aware of how we «hear» the our internal dialogue. In this way we will be able to identify many of the ideas and fears that are holding us back.
- Experience the positive emotions
Experiencing positive emotions with all our being is also called positive somatization. In essence, the author urges us to feel all positive - and not only negative - emotions more consciously. How to do this? By focusing attention on our body, as we would do in basic meditation exercises. Where do you feel each positive emotion? How are your body, your breath, your face affected?;
- Contemplate.
Reflecting does not mean rehashing our thoughts, guilt or excuses, but grasping larger ideas and becoming familiar with them: integrity, justice, success, happiness. It means we ask ourselves important questions as a way to build a value system in our lives. Such questions are: Is what you have chosen to do real? Is it good for you and for those around you? Is it useful? What can you learn from it?;
- Identify yourself
Describe yourself and emphasize the self-esteem yourself. What things are you proud of? What are your natural talents? What do you enjoy most about yourself? All of the «self-discovery» exercises are about finding your true self.
- Seek inspiration
When we talk about inspiration, we mean things that give us energy, fill our minds, nourish our soul and spirit. But you have to get out of your comfort zone to see these things almost everywhere. What new things do you want to learn? What challenges you enthusiasm; Write down everything that intrigues you. The inspiration is there, but it takes work.
- Forgive me.
Why do we forgive? The answer is selfish: So that we don't have to live with the poison. It is well known that holding a grudge makes it harder for us and makes us suffer. Isn't that reason enough to forgive? Forgiveness is something like spiritual detox. Learn to forgive yourself first of all.
- Change what you don't like
Our wants and needs change every day. We are talking about a constant change, which can even make our character change. Believe it. Make a list with characteristics you had that you no longer have. Also note what you don't like and would like to change. Write down the specific ways in which it can be changed, what actions on your part, and how often.
- Set limits
The rule is simple: treat yourself as you would like others to treat you. What don't you accept from others? What things are OK to do to conserve your energy and time? It's ours Responsibility to guard our own boundaries, not those of others.
- Upgrade your energy
Energy boosting habits are more or less the same for everyone and include better sleep, exercise, gratitude, priority to «wants», physical and spiritual detoxification, belief in something greater than oneself. Avoid habits that suck your energy without you realizing it and follow specific routines morning, noon and night.
- Choose your «race»
The feeling of belonging to a group with the same goals, concerns and needs is so important for a good life that research has linked it to longevity. If you feel out of place in your group or at work, then you may need to create a small network of people where you feel like they look like you and understand you. Start with your interests. I'm sure you'll find people who have the same things.
- Live unapologetically
A grandiose phrase, objectively a difficult task to conquer, but perhaps the most important for self-care. To live guilt-free, we must rid ourselves of many social, familial, and personal «shoulds.».
One way to achieve this more quickly is to remember what things they regret usually people reaching the end of their lives: because they did not allow joy or emotion, because they lived up to the expectations of others or worked too much, or even because they were estranged from friends and people they valued. Do it now account and go your own way, without the need for explanations.
