How to protect the child from paedophiles? That's what most normal parents are thinking these days. Parents whose priority is to raise healthy people mentally and physically. We hear all the things that are happening and it is now clear that there is no rhyme or reason to what is going on. All you can do is educate your child so that they are as aware as possible of the dangers without scaring them to death.

How to protect the child from pedophiles

Paedophiles are a real and present danger. What can we as parents do to protect our children from this danger? At the thought of one, we panic and want to spread our wings to protect our child from harm.

These are conversations that happen simultaneously with body awareness, consent, proper use of social media and mobile, the underwear rule, our personal boundaries. And that's where the sex talk starts.

For some parents this is a discussion they want to keep quiet, but how do you protect your child and how do you talk to them about the danger if they don't know all the information or whatever is enough to know depending on their age. Of course books always help with this.

What the child needs to know

The underwear rule. This rule makes it clear that no one is allowed to touch or ask to see the areas covered by our swimwear. These areas are private and personal. This is a boundary that the child should be very aware of.
Call their body parts by their names. You call the leg a leg, the navel a navel, why do you keep calling the penis or the vagina a dick and a duck? These are codes that pedophiles know.
NO SECRETS: With all letters capitalized. Someone will come along and trick the child and tell him that this is a secret. Upon hearing the word secret the child must immediately tell his parent that so-and-so told me the word secret. Even if something happens that he can't handle, he must know that there is his parent who is a person he can trust.
Teach it to respect its boundaries! He doesn't have to let anyone hold him or kiss him if he doesn't want to. The child needs to know that they can and do have the right to accept or deny anything about their body. No is an answer in itself and he must learn to respect his needs.
About social media. Maybe someone will ask the child to send them a picture. We make it clear that we don't send body parts to anyone, we don't post information about ourselves, where we live, what we are called, and of course we don't «friend» people we don't know.
In addition to his parents, it is good to know that he may have one or two other people in his safety circle whom he can trust to torment him, in case a parent is not available. Ask him to tell you these people.
When it comes to sex, you should definitely be aware of the concept of consent. Sex is an act of mutual love, between two adult (mature) people who both want to go through with it. Moreover, it is good for them to know the consequences of it.

Without scaring you

How can I talk to you, my child, without scaring you? I can't close my eyes to all the news that's been coming out lately. But I can't put you in a bowl to live forever. You have to get stronger and protect yourself against the dangers. Knowledge is power.

You're asking me to call your cell phone. Our children are not ready to enter this world. They look like robins in a vast and vast forest with wolves lurking from all sides to devour them.

Experts say don't let your children out of your sight. They are nowhere safe and that the only sure way to avoid a pedophile is to have the child guarded so they can't be caught chatting.

If he can't tell you in words

Children are innocent and easily manipulated. Your child may not be able to speak in words, but his actions will show that something is happening to him. He may have erratic behaviour, his drawings may be strange with body parts, with wildness. He may not be able to sleep, have restlessness and tantrums. He is afraid for no apparent reason.

We need to be alert and be able to detect such behaviours so that we can have a discussion with our child. Communication and acceptance are the ones that will help in this situation.

Lambrini Lada